The Shoulder
The Shoulder
61
bold-marten-202

A utility truck company knocked over my parked car and now the owner wants to 'handle it privately'

I still can't believe this happened. I was at work when a neighbor texted me saying my car had been hit. Came outside to find my whole front end destroyed — the bumper is hanging off, the hood is crumpled, the headlight assembly is smashed, and there's frame damage according to the tow driver who helped me move it. Turns out a landscaping company was working on a property a few doors down and one of their heavy trucks rolled forward and plowed right into my parked car. Nobody was in my car. Nobody was in THEIR truck either — they just didn't set the parking brake or something.

Here's where it gets weird. The owner of the landscaping company showed up within like 20 minutes, super friendly, super apologetic, kept putting his hand on my shoulder telling me "we're going to take care of you, don't worry." Then in the same breath he started talking about how filing through insurance would be a "nightmare for everyone" and could I just get a couple of estimates and he'd write me a check personally.

I got one estimate so far and it's already more than I expected — the shop flagged possible frame issues that won't be confirmed until they actually start tearing it down, so the final number could be significantly higher. I also don't have a rental right now and I've been bumming rides to work for five days.

My gut says don't trust the handshake deal. But I also don't want to be difficult if this guy is genuinely going to pay. Has anyone been in a situation like this? What would you do?

13replies

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13 replies

  • 20
    calm-newt-039

    I don't want to be harsh but I'm curious — does this guy's truck actually have commercial insurance? Because a small landscaping operation might be underinsured or operating on a personal auto policy that won't cover commercial use. Have you actually seen proof of his coverage? That might change the whole calculation here.

    • 10
      patient-optimist515

      Really glad you posted an update — gives the rest of us some hope.

  • 19
    cool-mole-596

    The moment he said 'don't go through insurance' that should have been a red flag flying at full mast. People who intend to actually pay don't usually pre-negotiate how you handle the paperwork. That friendliness can evaporate real fast once the dollar amount gets higher than he expected or his cash flow gets tight.

  • 13
    kind-mole-292

    Don't do the handshake deal. Full stop. Get his insurance information, report it to your own insurer, and let the companies handle it. You can still be polite to the guy — this doesn't have to be a war. But you need the protection of the formal process, especially with potential frame damage in the mix.

    • 5
      gentle-driver919

      How long did it end up taking in your case?

  • 12
    warm-seal-134

    Oh I've been EXACTLY here. Different situation — a contractor's trailer detached and hit my car in a parking lot — but the same "let's keep this between us" energy. The owner seemed so sincere. I agreed to go private. He paid the first estimate, then when the shop found additional damage he ghosted me completely. I ended up eating hundreds of dollars. File a claim. Protect yourself.

    • 15
      sharp-newt-611

      A few practical things worth doing right now regardless of how you decide to proceed: (1) File a police report if you haven't — get an official record of what happened and who was responsible. (2) Document everything with photos and video, including the position of his truck, any skid marks or lack thereof, and all damage to your vehicle. (3) Get that rental situation in writing if he's verbally promised to cover it. Verbal promises are really hard to enforce later. You don't have to be aggressive about any of this — just protect yourself with paperwork.

  • 11
    curious-seal-128

    The fact that he showed up quickly and admitted fault to your face is actually more than a lot of people get. That's a solid foundation. You can still hold him accountable through proper channels AND stay civil with him. Filing a claim isn't an act of war — it's just making sure there's a system backing you up if his goodwill runs out.

    • 3
      thankful-backseat188

      Adding this: keep copies of every email. It mattered for me.

    • 0
      hopeful-wanderer445

      That lines up with what my adjuster told me too.

  • 8
    steady-mole-999

    Not legal advice, but this fact pattern — a commercial vehicle causing damage to a parked car — is pretty straightforward liability-wise. The complication is that verbal payment promises are essentially unenforceable if he changes his mind, and supplemental damage after teardown is genuinely common with this type of impact. If the total ends up being significant and he stops cooperating, your options get much narrower if you never filed a formal claim. Worth at least a free consult with a PI attorney before you commit to any agreement.

  • 7
    quick-bison-425

    Spent years on the inside and I'll tell you — private agreements for vehicle damage almost never go smoothly once a supplement comes into play. The initial estimate is almost always low, especially when frame or structural damage is involved. If you go private and he balks at the higher number, you have very little leverage. At least with an insurance claim there's a documented process and someone to push back on his behalf if he won't pay. Don't let his charm short-circuit your common sense.

    • 15
      wise-wren-924

      Nobody's asking but — are YOU okay? Even if you weren't in the car, the stress of something like this hits your body hard. Five days of scrambling for rides, anxiety about money, dealing with someone pressuring you... that takes a toll. Make sure you're eating, sleeping, and not just grinding through this on adrenaline.