The Shoulder
The Shoulder
53
humble-grouse-771

Two accidents in one year broke something in me — anyone else dealing with this?

Hi everyone. Long post, sorry in advance. I've been lurking here for a while and finally feel ready to share because I genuinely don't know who else to talk to about this.

Earlier this year I was rear-ended pretty hard at a red light. Wasn't my fault at all — the other driver admitted they were distracted. Physically I came out of it with some whiplash and a bruised sternum, but honestly? The physical stuff healed faster than whatever happened in my head. I get anxious every single time someone pulls up behind me at a stop now. I keep checking my mirrors obsessively. My shoulders are basically up around my ears the whole time I'm driving.

Then, like four months later, I was a passenger in a friend's car and we got sideswiped on the highway. Again, not our fault. Nobody went to the hospital but it was a loud, jarring hit and I just… completely shut down. Didn't speak for like an hour afterward.

Since then I've had a really hard time getting into cars, especially as a passenger where I have zero control. I never had anxiety before any of this. I was a confident driver. Now I white-knuckle every single trip and I've turned down plans with friends because I didn't want to deal with the dread beforehand.

Has anyone else had back-to-back accidents mess with them mentally like this? Did it ever get better? I'm also wondering if the emotional/psychological side of things is something that factors into insurance claims at all, or if they just care about the physical stuff. Feeling kind of lost.

11replies

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11 replies

  • 24
    careful-finch-767

    To answer your question about whether the psychological side matters for claims — yes, it absolutely can. Emotional distress, anxiety, and reduced quality of life are legitimate parts of a personal injury claim. The key is documentation. If you see a therapist or even just mention the anxiety symptoms to your primary care doctor, get it in writing. Insurance adjusters will absolutely try to minimize anything that isn't a broken bone or a surgery, but documented mental health impacts are real damages. Don't assume you have to prove it with a cast or an X-ray.

    • 10
      spry-finch-056

      Not legal advice, but what you're describing — anxiety, avoidance behavior, impaired daily functioning after accidents — is something attorneys do take seriously when building a case. The challenge is connecting it clearly to the accidents and having it documented by a professional. If you haven't already, it's worth at least a free consultation with a PI attorney just to understand your options. Most won't charge you anything just to talk.

    • 1
      calm-survivor995

      Wish I had seen this a month ago — would have saved me a lot of stress.

  • 21
    careful-crow-829

    Just want to flag — if you're still in the claims process for either of these, be really careful what you say to adjusters. They are not your friends. I had an adjuster straight-up ask me 'so you're feeling better now?' in this super casual tone and I said 'yeah, mostly' without thinking, and that got used to minimize my settlement. Don't downplay your symptoms to anyone on their side, even in small talk.

  • 16
    warm-dove-812

    What you're describing — the hypervigilance, the physical tension, the avoidance — those are really classic signs of acute stress response, and after two traumatic events in close succession it honestly makes complete sense your nervous system is stuck in protective mode. This isn't weakness, it's just how brains work after repeated scary experiences.

    Please consider talking to a doctor or therapist who has experience with trauma, even if you think your injuries were 'minor.' The psychological impact of accidents is so underreported and undertreated. And keep a record of how this is affecting your daily life — missed plans, sleep issues, work impacts. All of that matters.

    • 7
      thankful-co-pilot155

      Exactly my experience. Persistence paid off in the end.

  • 13
    wise-raven-898

    Oh wow, reading this felt like reading my own diary. I had two accidents within about six months of each other a couple years back and the second one just broke something in my confidence. The first one I bounced back from okay, but after the second hit it was like my brain decided it was done pretending cars were safe. The anxiety does get better — slowly — but for me it took actually talking to someone about it, not just pushing through. Please don't do what I did and just white-knuckle it for a year hoping it goes away on its own.

    • 3
      kind-parent730

      Solid advice. Getting it in writing is the part most people skip.

  • 10
    genuine-grouse-069

    The fact that you're naming what's happening and reaching out is genuinely a big deal. A lot of people just push it down and it comes out sideways years later. You're already ahead of where I was. It does get better — I promise.

    • 0
      grounded-overpass503

      Adding this: keep copies of every email. It mattered for me.

  • 10
    patient-swift-613

    Two things: First, see a therapist — not optional, just do it. Second, document everything about how your daily life has changed because of these accidents. Write it down tonight while it's fresh. Dates, what you avoided, how you felt. That record will matter whether you end up in a legal process or just in your own healing journey.