The Shoulder
The Shoulder
63
Car accidentssharp-mole-137

TBI from my accident cost me my career and now my employer is making it worse

I don't even know where to start with this. About 18 months ago I was rear-ended by a commercial truck on the interstate — hit hard enough that I was airlifted. I had a pretty severe traumatic brain injury, spent weeks inpatient, and have been fighting through cognitive rehab ever since.

The stuff that's permanent is what nobody warned me about. Word retrieval problems, short-term memory issues, fatigue that hits like a wall in the middle of the afternoon, sensitivity to noise and light. I look totally normal on the outside so people just think I'm scatterbrained or not trying hard enough.

I went back to my job — same company I'd been with for years — and it has been a nightmare. Before I even came back, I found out (through a coworker I trust) that there had been conversations at the management level about finding reasons to push me out. Sure enough, within a couple months I started getting written up for things that are directly related to my TBI symptoms. Missing a step in a process. Forgetting a meeting. Taking longer to complete tasks.

I'm currently working with my neurologist to get formal documentation so I can request ADA accommodations. My HR department seems annoyed by the whole thing, which honestly makes me feel crazy.

I guess I just need to hear from someone who's been through something similar. Did you get accommodations? Did your employer actually follow through? Did it get better or did you eventually have to leave? I feel really alone in this and the emotional toll on top of the physical stuff is just... a lot.

12replies

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12 replies

  • 10
    wise-heron-720

    You are absolutely not alone. I had a moderate TBI after a highway accident two years ago and went through almost the exact same thing at work. The invisible symptoms are the hardest — nobody sees your brain not working right, they just see you messing up. I eventually did get accommodations approved (written instructions for every task, a quieter workspace, flexible start time) but I had to fight hard for every single one. HR drags their feet hoping you'll just quit. Don't quit.

  • 24
    bright-badger-031

    TBI recovery is so misunderstood in workplace settings, and what you're describing — fatigue, memory issues, processing speed changes — are completely consistent with what we see in patients with your type of injury. These aren't character flaws. They're neurological. Make sure your documentation from your neurologist is as specific as possible about functional limitations and not just diagnosis codes. That specificity is what actually drives accommodation decisions. Also please make sure you're still seeing a specialist regularly — TBI symptoms can shift over time and your treatment plan should too.

    • 18
      kind-marten-607

      Just want to flag — if you're still in any kind of settlement process from the truck accident itself, be careful what you put in writing at work or anywhere. Insurance defense teams have been known to dig up employment records and try to use them to minimize your injury claim. I'd loop in whoever is handling your accident case before you sign anything HR puts in front of you.

    • 7
      kind-dreamer653

      Solid advice. Getting it in writing is the part most people skip.

  • 9
    bright-otter-195

    Not legal advice, but what you're describing — management discussing getting rid of you before you returned, then writing you up for disability-related performance issues — that fact pattern is exactly the kind of thing employment attorneys who work alongside PI lawyers want to hear about. The ADA process matters, but so does documenting every reprimand you receive in writing and keeping copies somewhere outside of work. Timing and paper trails matter a lot in these situations.

  • 9
    brave-swift-748

    A few practical things worth knowing: the ADA accommodation request process is supposed to be an 'interactive process' — meaning your employer is legally obligated to actually engage with you about what might work, not just say yes or no. If HR is just stonewalling, that itself can be a problem. Also document EVERYTHING. Every conversation, every write-up, every meeting. Email summaries to yourself after verbal conversations so there's a timestamp. I've seen cases where that paper trail made all the difference.

    • 10
      calm-parent934

      Really glad you posted an update — gives the rest of us some hope.

  • 20
    warm-mole-800

    Former insurance adjuster here. Employers do sometimes build a paper trail specifically to justify termination when they want to avoid accommodation costs or disability-related leave obligations. The write-ups that start appearing right after someone returns from a serious injury aren't always coincidental. I'm not saying that's definitely what's happening to you, but the pattern you're describing is one I saw play out more than once from the other side of the table.

    • 3
      gentle-wanderer425

      That lines up with what my adjuster told me too.

  • 7
    bold-seal-549

    I just want to say I'm so sorry. You survived something absolutely traumatic, you fought your way back, and instead of support you're getting punished for it. That is not okay. Please don't let them make you feel like YOU are the problem here. You're not.

    • 6
      careful-traveler830

      This is really helpful — thank you for posting it.

  • 10
    steady-elk-210

    Three things: get the ADA paperwork moving as fast as possible so you have formal status, stop having any important conversations with HR verbally — email only so everything is documented, and seriously consider talking to an employment attorney in addition to whoever is handling your accident claim. What you're describing could involve both personal injury AND employment law. Don't try to navigate this without some kind of legal guidance.