The Shoulder
The Shoulder
68
Car accidentsspry-raven-129

Rear-ended with my whole family in the car — kids got hurt, I'm overwhelmed. What now?

I don't even know where to start. Last week I was stopped at a red light with my three kids (ages 5, 9, and 13) when a delivery van slammed into the back of us. The hit wasn't subtle — we were fully stopped and he was going fast enough that we got pushed forward into the intersection.

All three kids complained of neck and shoulder pain right away. My youngest was crying and saying her head hurt, so we went straight to urgent care. They checked her out, did some imaging, and said she has a mild concussion on top of the whiplash. My older two are stiff and sore but nothing showed up on their scans, thankfully. I've got neck and upper back pain myself that's gotten worse over the past few days, not better.

The driver works for a company — it was clearly a commercial vehicle with a logo on the side. I got photos of everything at the scene and filed a police report. The other driver's employer's insurance has already called me twice and they're being weirdly friendly and casual about it, which honestly makes me nervous.

I've never dealt with anything like this. A few things I'm really unsure about:

  • Do I need a lawyer, or can I handle this myself since liability seems obvious?
  • Should I let the insurance adjuster record a statement?
  • How do I make sure my kids' medical stuff is properly documented for a claim?
  • Is it normal for injuries to feel worse a few days later?

We're in the Southeast if that matters. Any advice from people who've been through something similar would mean a lot right now. I just want to make sure my kids are protected.

10replies

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10 replies

  • 9
    humble-raven-030

    A few practical things that will matter later: make sure every family member has their OWN medical records documenting their specific symptoms — don't let things get lumped together. Get a copy of the police report as soon as it's available. Write down everything you remember about the accident while it's fresh — speed, road conditions, what the driver said afterward, all of it. If the delivery company has any dashcam or GPS data, that stuff can disappear fast, which is another reason an attorney may want to send a preservation letter sooner rather than later.

  • 12
    daring-badger-391

    I'm so sorry you're going through this, especially with little kids involved. That must have been absolutely terrifying. Please take care of yourself too — it's easy to focus entirely on the kids and ignore your own neck and back pain until it becomes a real problem. You matter in this claim too.

    • 1
      grounded-offramp213

      This thread is gold. Thanks everyone.

  • 10
    tidy-dove-563

    Short answers: yes, get a lawyer — commercial vehicle + multiple injured kids is not a DIY situation. No, don't do a recorded statement. Yes, keep taking your kids to follow-up appointments even when they seem to be improving. And stop being friendly back to that adjuster — polite but brief, and don't volunteer information.

  • 9
    kind-kestrel-119

    Oh man, I went through something almost identical two years ago — commercial vehicle, full car of family members, all the chaos that follows. The thing that helped us most was getting everyone to a doctor IMMEDIATELY and making sure every single symptom was written down, even the ones that seemed minor. Insurers love to argue later that injuries weren't that serious if there are any gaps in care. Keep every receipt, every appointment, every note your kids' teachers send home if they're missing school. Document everything obsessively.

    • 16
      calm-marmot-112

      Not legal advice, but I'd strongly suggest at least consulting with a personal injury attorney before you talk further with the other driver's insurer. Most PI attorneys do free consultations and work on contingency, so there's no upfront cost. Commercial vehicle claims can get complicated fast — there may be employer liability, driver logs, maintenance records and other evidence that needs to be preserved quickly. The friendly adjuster vibe is a red flag, not a green one.

    • 3
      curious-passenger811

      Appreciate the detailed write-up. Saving this for later.

  • 16
    bold-crane-963

    Yes, it is completely normal to feel worse 2-3 days after a crash — that's actually super common with soft tissue injuries and concussions. The inflammation peaks a bit after the initial trauma. Please make sure your youngest is being monitored closely for concussion symptoms: headaches, light sensitivity, mood changes, trouble concentrating, sleep issues. If any of those get worse instead of better, go back in. Don't let anyone — including an insurance company — rush her into a 'she's fine' conclusion before she's actually had time to heal.

    • 12
      sharp-beaver-256

      That 'weirdly friendly' adjuster? Trust your gut on that one. They're calling you fast and being nice because they want to get in front of this before you lawyer up. Do NOT give a recorded statement. I cannot stress that enough. Anything you say will be used to minimize your claim later. You don't have any legal obligation to give them a recorded statement, and you can simply say you're not comfortable doing that yet.

  • 8
    steady-marten-361

    I used to work on the insurance side and I'll be honest with you — when a commercial carrier calls quickly and acts friendly, they're doing damage control. They know liability is pretty clear and they want to lowball you before you understand what your claim is actually worth. A claim involving multiple injured people, including a child with a documented concussion, is significant. They are not your friend right now even if they sound like it.