The Shoulder
The Shoulder
73
Car accidentssilent-badger-517

Rear-ended 2 months ago, at-fault driver ghosting insurer — do I just keep waiting forever?

Posting from my lunch break so sorry if this is scattered.

Back in late winter I was sitting at a complete stop at a red light when someone plowed into the back of me. Pretty solid hit — my head snapped back hard and I could feel it in my neck immediately. We pulled over, swapped info, and then honestly the other driver seemed really eager to leave. They were gone before I even thought to call 911, so there's no official police report. My bad — I know that now.

I went to an urgent care that evening because the neck stiffness and headaches were getting worse. They did some imaging, said nothing was broken, diagnosed me with soft tissue strain and whiplash, sent me home with a referral for follow-up PT.

Fast forward to now — almost two months later — and the other driver has been basically unreachable. My insurance company keeps telling me they can't establish liability without a statement from the at-fault driver. Meanwhile:

  • My rear bumper is cracked and the trunk latch is broken (can't open it manually)
  • I've gotten surprise charges from the urgent care and the imaging center hitting my bank account with zero notice
  • The at-fault driver's insurer told me their policy "may not extend to my medical expenses" — which makes no sense to me?
  • PT bills are starting to stack up too

I feel like I'm doing everything right and just getting strung along. My own insurer keeps saying "give it more time" but I need my car fixed and I can't keep absorbing these medical bills.

Has anyone been through something like this? What actually moved things forward for you? At what point do you stop waiting and do something else?

12replies

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12 replies

  • 14
    quick-swift-816

    Ugh, this is almost exactly what happened to me last year. The other driver was cooperative at the scene but then basically disappeared on the insurance company. What finally broke things loose for me was filing through my own collision coverage and letting my insurer go after the other driver themselves (subrogation, I think it's called). It cost me my deductible up front but at least my car got fixed while the back-and-forth kept going. Might be worth asking your agent if that's an option for you.

    • 5
      weathered-offramp249

      Saving this whole thread. Really appreciate the honesty here.

  • 14
    silent-crane-645

    Please don't let the medical side fall through the cracks while you're dealing with the car and insurance stuff. Whiplash and soft tissue injuries can genuinely linger or get worse if you're not following up consistently. Keep going to PT, keep every appointment, and make sure every visit is documented well. If you're still having headaches two months out, mention that specifically to your provider — that's worth a closer look. Your medical records are also going to matter a lot if this ends up in any kind of formal claim process.

  • 14
    daring-hare-466

    This sounds so exhausting and stressful, I'm sorry you're dealing with all of it at once. The surprise charges hitting your bank account with no warning would send me over the edge. I really hope you find some answers here — you clearly did everything you were supposed to do and you shouldn't be the one suffering for it.

  • 14
    quiet-hare-367

    Quick question — when you swapped info at the scene, did you get a photo of their insurance card and license? And do you have any texts or calls with them after the accident? Even a one-word reply from them could help establish contact. Also curious what your own policy covers — do you know if you have UM/UIM or MedPay? Those details change your options a lot.

  • 11
    gentle-hare-600

    Stop waiting for their insurance to do the right thing. File under your own collision coverage, use your own uninsured/underinsured motorist coverage for the medical bills if you have it, and let the attorneys figure out the rest. You're financing their delay with your broken car and your credit card. Make your insurer work for the premiums you've been paying.

  • 9
    humble-otter-613

    I worked claims for years and I'll be honest with you — when a file sits without liability being confirmed, it often just... sits. Nobody's incentivized to push it forward aggressively unless you're pushing back. A few things that tend to shake things loose: a formal written demand letter, involving an attorney (even just a consultation letter sent on your behalf), or filing a complaint with your state's department of insurance. That last one gets attention fast, in my experience. Also, the thing about the at-fault driver's policy not covering your medicals — ask them to put that in writing. That's a weird claim and you'll want it documented.

    • 19
      spry-tern-502

      A couple of practical things worth knowing: even without a police report, you can sometimes get an accident report filed after the fact — check with your local traffic division about a delayed report. Also, if you have MedPay or PIP coverage on your own policy, that can cover your medical bills regardless of who's at fault, and your insurer has to tell you whether you have it. As for the surprise charges hitting your card — call the billing departments directly and ask them to pause collection while your claim is pending. Most will do it if you explain there's an open insurance dispute. Not legal advice, just stuff I've seen people do.

    • 8
      tired-rider199

      Going through something similar right now. Did following up actually move the needle for you?

  • 8
    warm-owl-335

    Not legal advice, but I'd say this situation is exactly why a free consultation with a PI attorney is worth your time. When the at-fault driver is uncooperative and their insurer is being slippery about coverage, you're essentially navigating a process that's designed to be confusing. An attorney can send a formal representation letter that tends to change how quickly people respond — and most work on contingency so there's no upfront cost to you. Just something to consider.

  • 5
    warm-owl-436

    "Give it more time" is 100% a delay tactic. Every week that passes, your injuries feel less urgent on paper, your memory of details gets fuzzier, and you're more likely to just accept whatever lowball thing they eventually offer. Don't let them normalize the wait. Start documenting every single call — date, time, who you spoke to, exactly what they said. That paper trail matters later.

    • 1
      curious-passenger840

      That lines up with what my adjuster told me too.