The Shoulder
The Shoulder
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Car accidentscalm-stoat-394

My passenger's family is threatening criminal charges after our accident — is this even real?

I'm still kind of in shock writing this. A few weeks ago I was driving my coworker home after we stayed late to finish a project together. Road conditions were bad — there was a weird patch of ice nobody was expecting — and I lost control going through an intersection. We hit a curb and the car spun. Airbags went off. It was terrifying but we were both conscious and talking afterward.

She ended up with some bruised ribs and a possible hairline fracture in her wrist. I walked away with whiplash and a gash on my forearm. We were both pretty shaken but okay, all things considered.

Here's where it gets insane. Her brother — not even her, her brother — sent me a voicemail two days later saying their family is consulting with someone about pressing criminal charges against me and that I "intentionally" put her in danger. She was right there with me. She knows it was an accident. She's even texted me to apologize for her family's behavior.

I genuinely don't understand what crime they think happened here. It was icy roads and bad luck. I wasn't speeding, I wasn't on my phone, I wasn't impaired in any way. I'm already dealing with my own injuries and a totaled car and now THIS.

Has anyone dealt with family members of a passenger going completely off the rails after an accident? Is there any actual legal risk here, or is this just grief and anger talking? Do I need a lawyer just to protect myself even if no charges are ever formally filed?

I feel like I'm being punished for surviving.

11replies

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11 replies

  • 6
    quiet-wren-990

    Oh wow, I felt this post in my chest. After my accident my passenger's ex got involved and started making all kinds of noise about suing me even though she never asked him to. It was 100% posturing. The people actually IN the car with you usually know the truth — and it sounds like your coworker does. That counts for a lot.

    • 10
      bright-mole-552

      Whatever you do, don't discuss the accident details with anyone from her family or their potential lawyer. Anything you say trying to be nice or explain yourself can get twisted. I learned that the hard way. Let your insurance handle communication and keep your mouth shut outside of that.

  • 10
    keen-crow-268

    Not legal advice, but I'll say this: "second degree murder" or any intentional-harm charge requires prosecutors to believe you meant to cause harm. An icy intersection and a car spinning doesn't come close to that threshold. Angry family members can say whatever they want — actually convincing law enforcement or a DA to pursue charges is a completely different thing. That said, if you receive anything in writing or anyone contacts you claiming to represent them legally, stop engaging and talk to your own attorney immediately.

  • 14
    swift-vole-025

    The civil and criminal sides of this are separate things worth understanding. On the civil side, as a passenger she could potentially make a claim against your auto insurance for her injuries — that's actually pretty normal and doesn't require anyone to think you did anything wrong. On the criminal side, what the brother is describing sounds like it would never survive a prosecutor's review given the circumstances. Document everything though: the weather that night, any accident report, photos, your own medical records. Just have it ready.

  • 7
    mellow-swan-712

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. You're already dealing with your own injuries and the trauma of the crash and now you have to worry about this too? That's genuinely unfair. Please don't isolate — talk to people you trust, and honestly look into talking to a lawyer just so you feel less alone in this.

    • 4
      restless-road-soul576

      Exactly my experience. Persistence paid off in the end.

    • 3
      quiet-walker731

      Appreciate the detailed write-up. Saving this for later.

  • 9
    daring-beaver-444

    From the insurance side of things — family members who weren't in the vehicle have zero standing to file claims themselves. Her injuries may result in a claim against your liability coverage, and that's your insurer's problem to handle, not yours personally. The criminal threat is almost certainly noise. I saw families make all kinds of threats in the aftermath of accidents. It rarely becomes anything, especially when the person actually involved isn't pushing it.

  • 8
    daring-swift-958

    Three things: First, get a police report if you don't already have one — it'll document road conditions and the facts of the scene. Second, notify your insurance company fully and let them know there may be a claim or dispute coming. Third, stop communicating with the brother entirely. You don't owe him an explanation and anything you say won't help you.

    • 12
      brave-swift-726

      Not doubting you, but I'm curious — is there any history between you and this coworker or her family that might explain why they jumped to "intentional"? Sometimes these reactions come from somewhere. Either way it doesn't change the legal reality, I'm just wondering if there's context that might help you understand what's driving this.

  • 9
    careful-newt-411

    Please don't let the stress of this derail your own recovery. Whiplash is sneaky — it can feel manageable at first and then get much worse over the following weeks. Make sure you're following up with a doctor for yourself, not just dealing with the legal drama. Your health has to come first right now.