The Shoulder
The Shoulder
62
Insurancecool-finch-718

Other driver is lying about fault and told me not to talk to their insurance — what do I do?

So this happened a few days ago and I'm still kind of rattled by the whole thing.

I was driving through a neighborhood when another car pulled out of a side street and clipped the front corner of my car. We both pulled over. The other driver — an older guy — gets out and almost immediately starts telling me I was going too fast and that I ran a stop sign. There's no stop sign on my road. I was on the main through-street. He was the one pulling out.

The exchange was tense but we got through it. Traded insurance cards, took photos of both cars. Here's where it gets weird: before we even part ways, he goes "don't bother calling my insurance, I'm handling this myself." Then, two hours later, I get a call from HIS insurance company saying he already filed an incident report claiming I was at fault.

So he filed on me — after telling me not to contact them. That feels deliberate.

The thing is, I have a dashcam. The footage clearly shows me on the main road with no stop sign, and him nosing out and cutting across my lane. I wasn't speeding. I even had enough time to brake slightly before he hit me.

Now I'm unsure what to do:

  • Do I file with my own insurance and let them fight it out?
  • Do I contact his insurance directly and share my footage?
  • Is there any risk to me if I just wait and see what happens?

My car has a decent amount of damage on the front bumper and wheel well. No injuries thankfully, but my neck has been a little stiff the past two days.

Has anyone dealt with something like this? I feel like he's trying to get ahead of the story before I can tell mine.

12replies

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12 replies

  • 21
    clever-badger-732

    Not legal advice, but a couple things stand out here: the other driver's instruction to not contact his insurance is meaningless — you have every right to open a third-party claim directly with them. More importantly, if you have clear footage showing right-of-way, that's strong evidence for a liability determination in your favor. And the neck stiffness? Don't ignore it. Get evaluated now, not later. If this becomes a dispute, gaps in medical treatment get used against claimants.

    • 20
      keen-crow-911

      Ugh, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this on top of already being shaken up from the accident. The fact that he immediately told you not to call his insurance and then turned around and called yours sounds really manipulative. You did nothing wrong — just make sure you're protecting yourself now. And seriously, go get that neck looked at. Please.

    • 4
      steady-traveler911

      Going through something similar right now. Did following up actually move the needle for you?

  • 17
    steady-stoat-449

    A few practical things worth knowing: you are absolutely allowed to contact the other driver's insurance yourself — there's nothing legally stopping you, regardless of what he told you. You're a third-party claimant and they have to talk to you. Also, document that stiff neck. Even if it feels minor right now, soft tissue injuries sometimes worsen over a week or two. Getting checked out creates a medical record tied to the date of the accident, which matters if this turns into anything more.

  • 17
    keen-marten-797

    Stop overthinking it. You have a dashcam. That's basically a witness that can't lie. File with your own insurance, hand over the footage, and let the process work. The other guy played his card early — you just need to play yours.

    • 8
      calm-passenger763

      Wish I had seen this a month ago — would have saved me a lot of stress.

  • 14
    mellow-swan-817

    Please don't brush off the neck stiffness. I know it seems small compared to the car stuff, but whiplash-type symptoms often peak around 48-72 hours after impact, not immediately. Go see your doctor or an urgent care and just tell them you were in a car accident and your neck has been stiff since. Let them document it. You don't have to make it a big deal — just get it on record.

  • 13
    spry-raven-264

    Almost the exact same thing happened to me about a year ago. The other driver filed before I even got home. My biggest regret was waiting a few days before contacting my own insurance — I kept thinking it would just sort itself out. It didn't. Call YOUR insurance today, tell them you have dashcam footage, and let them know the other driver already filed a claim against you. The footage is your best friend here. Don't sit on it.

  • 12
    bright-fox-834

    I used to work claims for a major carrier and I'll tell you straight: when two conflicting reports come in, adjusters look for corroborating evidence and whoever provided it first tends to shape the investigation. Dashcam footage that directly contradicts the other driver's account is huge — but you need to formally submit it, not just say you have it. Ask your insurer how to upload it or email it directly to the file. Get a claim number and reference it every time you communicate.

    • 0
      steady-rider225

      Seconding this. The same approach worked for me last year.

  • 7
    calm-swift-884

    That move — filing on you and then telling you not to contact their insurance — is a classic attempt to control the narrative. He got his version in first hoping you'd be slow to respond. Their adjuster is already building a file based on his story. Every day you wait, that version gets more 'established.' Contact both insurances NOW and get your footage submitted in writing, not just mentioned in a phone call.

    • 8
      steady-dreamer553

      That lines up with what my adjuster told me too.