Other driver blew a stop sign, totaled my car, now their insurer says I'm partially at fault??

Almost exactly this happened to me about two years ago. Other driver ran a stop sign, I had footage, and their insurance still tried to pin 15% on me. I just kept repeating 'talk to my insurance' every single time they called. Stayed firm, didn't engage with their liability arguments at all. Eventually it got resolved through arbitration and I came out fine. The dashcam footage is huge — don't let them rattle you.

This is a classic tactic. They contact you directly because they're hoping you'll say something that gives them an opening — like 'I didn't see them coming' or 'it happened so fast' — anything they can twist into 'failure to avoid.' Stop taking their calls. Seriously. Let your insurance handle all communication with them. You already did the right thing telling them to go through your carrier.

Not legal advice, but from what you're describing — unambiguous stop sign violation caught on dashcam, police presumably documenting the scene — the 'failure to take evasive action' argument is a tough one for them to win. That theory usually requires showing you had meaningful time and opportunity to avoid the collision, which a split-second intersection impact makes hard to prove. If arbitration doesn't go your way or there are injury damages involved, it might be worth a free consult with a PI attorney just to understand your options.

I used to work on the claims side and I'll tell you — when another carrier contacts you directly after you've already reported to your own insurance, that's a flag. They're fishing. The 'evasive action' argument is a standard deflection they throw out to soften the liability number before arbitration. With clear dashcam footage showing a stop sign violation, that argument tends to fall apart pretty quickly in inter-company arb. Just make sure your own adjuster has a high-quality copy of the full unedited video.

The arbitration process your adjuster mentioned is pretty routine between insurance companies — it's not like court, it's mostly a paper review by a neutral third party. Both carriers submit their evidence and arguments, and the arbitrator decides the liability split. Dashcam footage showing a clear stop sign violation is about as strong as evidence gets. I'd also keep a paper trail of every communication with the other driver's insurer, including dates and what was said.

Are you doing okay physically? Sometimes after a T-bone people feel fine for a day or two and then the soreness and stiffness hits hard — especially in the neck and shoulder. Even if you think you're okay, please get checked out. Soft tissue injuries don't always show up on adrenaline.

Stop answering the other insurance company's calls. Full stop. You have your own insurance for exactly this reason. Let them fight it out. Your job right now is to document everything — your car's damage, any medical visits, rental receipts, all of it. The liability question will sort itself out; don't let it distract you from protecting your own claim.

I know it's frustrating but honestly — you have dashcam footage. So many people in your exact situation have nothing but their word against the other driver's. That video is your best friend through this whole process. You're actually in a much stronger position than most.

Not doubting you, but do you know what the other driver actually told their insurance happened? Sometimes the story their insurer is working from is wildly different from reality, and knowing that can help you understand why they're pushing back. Also — was there any police report filed? A citation issued? That matters a lot in how arbitration goes.