The Shoulder
The Shoulder
53
sharp-badger-614

Neighbor backed over my husband in our own parking area — now everything is falling apart

I don't even know where to start. About six weeks ago my husband was walking through the shared parking area behind our townhouse complex when the guy who lives two units down reversed out of his spot without checking his mirrors or anything. Hit my husband hard enough to knock him down. He ended up with a fractured pelvis and a badly torn ligament in his knee.

Here's what makes it even more overwhelming: my husband has been managing a chronic autoimmune condition for years, and the trauma from this accident has sent his symptoms into a serious flare. His doctors are genuinely concerned about long-term complications now that weren't on the table before.

I work full-time but I've had to burn through almost all my PTO just being there for appointments, picking up prescriptions, helping him get around the house. We have two kids. I've started looking into whether we can even afford to stay in our place because between his increased medication costs, the PT bills, and me missing work, the math just isn't adding up anymore.

The neighbor's insurance reached out almost immediately and honestly their friendliness is making me nervous. They're asking for a recorded statement and want to know if we're 'open to resolving this quickly.' Something about that phrasing doesn't sit right with me.

Has anyone dealt with an injury claim when the at-fault person is literally your neighbor? How do you handle the day-to-day awkwardness AND protect yourselves legally at the same time? Any advice on the insurance side — especially whether we should talk to a lawyer before giving that statement — would mean a lot right now.

13replies

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13 replies

  • 19
    clever-lynx-062

    That 'resolve this quickly' language is a massive red flag. Insurance adjusters are trained to close claims fast — before the full extent of injuries is known — because early settlements are almost always lower. Your husband's condition is still evolving, you said so yourself. Once you sign anything, that's usually it. Do not give a recorded statement and do not accept anything without understanding exactly what you're giving up.

    • 1
      honest-passenger984

      Seconding this. The same approach worked for me last year.

  • 21
    quick-seal-147

    I used to work claims and I'll be real with you — when an adjuster calls quickly and sounds super nice and cooperative, that's a strategy, not a coincidence. They've already flagged this as a potentially high-value claim because of the fracture and the pre-existing condition. They want to lock you in before his doctors have a full picture. The pre-existing condition actually complicates things in your favor in some ways, because aggravation of an existing condition is absolutely compensable. Don't let them use it against you.

  • 7
    steady-otter-762

    Not legal advice, but please talk to a personal injury attorney before you give that recorded statement — most do free consultations for situations like this. The combination of serious fractures, a pre-existing condition now in flare, AND documented lost income for you as the caretaker is exactly the kind of multi-layered claim where early settlements leave people shortchanged years down the road. The neighbor living nearby doesn't change your legal position at all.

  • 20
    hearty-finch-986

    We went through something similar — person we knew, close quarters, felt weird to 'go legal' on them. But honestly? Their insurance company has zero loyalty to your neighbor either. They're just trying to pay as little as possible. We waited too long to get a lawyer involved and I regret it. Don't let the personal relationship make you hesitant to protect your family.

    • 10
      quiet-neighbor828

      Thanks for sharing. Hope things are getting a little easier for you.

  • 14
    clever-newt-576

    The autoimmune flare piece is really important and I hope his care team is documenting everything carefully right now. Trauma — physical and emotional — genuinely can destabilize autoimmune conditions in ways that aren't always immediately obvious. Make sure every specialist he sees is noting the connection to the accident in their records. That documentation matters if this goes anywhere legally or medically down the line.

    • 4
      grounded-backseat786

      Following up on this — any update on how it turned out?

  • 9
    quiet-fox-015

    A few practical things: keep a daily log starting now — his pain levels, what he can and can't do, appointments, medications, anything you've had to take on that you didn't before. Also save every receipt and bill, even the small stuff. And your lost PTO and missed work hours? Write those down too with dates. If you end up working with an attorney, that kind of organized record makes a real difference. It also helps you remember details that fade over time.

  • 7
    clever-stoat-213

    I'm so sorry you're both going through this. The stress of managing his health was already a lot, and now you're dealing with financial pressure AND the weirdness of it being someone you have to see all the time. Please don't try to handle the insurance stuff alone — you've got enough on your plate just taking care of your family.

  • 8
    patient-raven-615

    Was there any kind of incident report filed — police, property management, anything? And did anyone witness it happen? I ask because in a shared parking area, if there's any ambiguity about what happened, having documentation and witnesses early on matters a lot.

  • 16
    swift-lynx-554

    I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but the fact that liability here seems pretty clear — he was on foot, neighbor was reversing, there's presumably a police or incident report — actually puts you in a relatively stronger position than a lot of accident victims. That clarity is something. Focus on getting the right support around you and let that work in your favor.

    • 4
      restless-sidewalk958

      Adding this: keep copies of every email. It mattered for me.