The Shoulder
The Shoulder
60
swift-tern-457

Driver blew through a red light and shattered my brother's collarbone — I'm livid

I'm posting this because I genuinely don't know what to do with this anger and my brother is too doped up on pain meds to advocate for himself right now, so I'm doing it for him.

Three weeks ago he was driving home from a night shift — totally sober, totally alert — and some guy in a pickup ran a red light and slammed into his driver's side door. The intersection has a camera, so at least there's footage. My brother had two broken ribs, a shattered collarbone, and a pretty serious concussion. He was in the hospital for almost a week. The other driver had a scratch on his arm and was posting on social media the same night. I'm not joking.

The guy got a citation. That's it. A citation.

My brother's car is totaled. He's a contractor — he cannot work right now. He lives alone. I've basically moved in to help him with basic stuff because he can't lift his arm above his waist. He's doing PT twice a week and the bills are already stacking up even with insurance.

We filed a claim with the at-fault driver's insurance but they've been weirdly quiet. His own insurance has been responsive at least, but it feels like we're just supposed to sit here and wait while this other guy gets to go on with his life.

I guess I'm asking — is this normal? Do we just wait? Does anyone have experience with how long this drags out when liability seems pretty obvious? And honestly... does anyone else just feel furious that someone can cause this much damage to another person's life and basically walk away?

12replies

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12 replies

  • 20
    sharp-stoat-531

    I felt every word of this. My dad got hit by someone who ran a stop sign last year and the frustration of watching the at-fault person just continue their life while your family member struggles is something I wouldn't wish on anyone. It does get better but the early weeks are brutal. You're doing right by your brother just by being there.

    • 6
      candid-swan-707

      The 'weirdly quiet' thing from the other driver's insurance is not accidental. They go quiet on purpose hoping you'll either get frustrated and accept a low offer, or say something that muddies liability. Do NOT let your brother give them a recorded statement without talking to someone first. Seriously. That's one of the first things they'll ask for and it's almost never in the claimant's favor.

  • 15
    keen-bison-955

    I'm so sorry. You sound exhausted and you're clearly holding this whole thing together for your brother. Please make sure you're taking care of yourself too — caregiver burnout is real and you can't pour from an empty cup. Sending you both so much support.

    • 3
      calm-wanderer396

      Same boat here. Did anyone mention a deadline to watch out for?

  • 12
    quiet-crow-377

    Not legal advice, but given the documented injury severity, the existing camera footage, and the citation — this is exactly the kind of situation where at least a free consultation with a personal injury attorney makes sense before your brother talks to the other driver's insurer again. Most PI attorneys work on contingency so there's usually no upfront cost. Just worth knowing your options before you're locked into anything.

    • 8
      steady-walker564

      Going through something similar right now. Did following up actually move the needle for you?

  • 10
    candid-grouse-472

    I used to work claims and I'll be honest — when liability is clear-cut like this (camera footage, citation, obvious fault), the delay is usually a strategy. They're either waiting to see how serious the injuries end up being, or they're hoping the claimant settles before they fully understand the extent of medical costs. With a collarbone surgery and ongoing PT, your brother's treatment is probably not close to done. Settling before maximum medical improvement is one of the biggest mistakes people make.

    • 6
      quiet-dreamer503

      This is exactly what I needed to read today. Thank you.

  • 9
    mellow-wolf-909

    To answer your question — yes, it can be 'normal' for the other party's insurer to go quiet early on, especially with injuries this significant. They know a bigger claim is coming and they're not in a hurry. One thing worth doing right now: make sure your brother is keeping all his documentation in one place. Medical records, bills, PT notes, any out-of-pocket expenses, even mileage to appointments. If this goes further, that paper trail is everything.

  • 9
    spry-swift-520

    Stop waiting for the insurance company to tell you what to do. They work for the other driver, not your brother. Get a PI attorney on the phone this week — free consult, no obligation. The footage and the citation basically hand them liability. Your brother is a contractor who can't work. That lost income matters. Don't leave that on the table by going it alone.

  • 7
    brave-raven-193

    Collarbone fractures plus rib injuries are no joke recovery-wise. He needs to take the PT seriously and not push through pain to 'prove' he's better — that can actually set back healing and create long-term complications. Also make sure every single appointment, every symptom, every bad night is documented somewhere. A pain journal sounds tedious but it genuinely matters later.

    • 7
      steady-driver303

      How long did it end up taking in your case?