The Shoulder
The Shoulder
70
Property damageplain-otter-386

My car might be totaled and the other driver's gone ghost on their insurance — what do I do?

So this happened about a week ago and I'm still stressed out about it. I was driving through a green light when a pickup came barreling out of a parking lot exit without stopping and slammed into my front passenger side. Full T-bone basically. We pulled over, I got photos of everything, we traded info, seemed fine.

Fast forward a few days and I call the other driver's insurance to open a claim and they tell me the policyholder hasn't reported the incident and isn't responding to them either. Cool. Super cool.

My car is currently sitting at a body shop. The front axle is visibly damaged, the tire is sitting at a weird angle, and the shop is already hinting that the frame might be involved. I have a feeling this thing isn't coming back from that.

I do have collision coverage on my own policy so technically I could go through myself, but then I'm on the hook for my deductible while this guy just disappears? That feels so wrong.

A few things I'm genuinely unsure about:

  • Is there a point where the other driver's insurance HAS to respond?
  • If my car gets declared a total loss, what exactly does that process look like?
  • Should I even be talking to adjusters right now or just wait?

I wasn't hurt badly — a little sore in my neck and shoulder but nothing I've gone to the doctor for yet. Someone told me I should get checked out regardless. Idk, it doesn't feel serious enough to make a big deal of.

Any experience with something like this would really help. I feel like I'm just waiting for things to happen to me instead of doing anything.

13replies

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13 replies

  • 20
    spry-hare-776

    Do NOT let either insurance company pressure you into a quick settlement on the car before you know how you're feeling physically. They love to close out the property damage fast and then you've got way less leverage on anything else. The soreness you're describing can turn into something more significant — I've seen it happen to people who thought they were 'basically fine.'

    • 8
      tired-parent195

      Appreciate the detailed write-up. Saving this for later.

  • 16
    silent-seal-867

    Former adjuster here. When a policyholder doesn't report or cooperate, the insurer will typically send a reservation of rights letter and then investigate anyway — they have an obligation to. It's slow and frustrating but you're not necessarily at a dead end. That said, going through your own collision coverage right now isn't admitting defeat. Your insurer can subrogate against the at-fault party to recover costs, including your deductible, if liability gets established. It's not a perfect system but it keeps your car moving through the process.

    • 5
      quiet-parent605

      How long did it end up taking in your case?

  • 16
    gentle-newt-376

    Did you get a police report filed at the scene? That changes things a lot. If there's an official report it's much harder for the other driver's insurance to just look the other way. If not, do you at least have the other driver's plate number confirmed in the photos? Just trying to figure out where you actually stand.

  • 15
    genuine-newt-532

    It actually sounds like you did a lot of things right at the scene — photos, exchanging info, staying calm. A lot of people panic and forget all of that. You're in a better position than you might feel like right now. The insurance stuff is a headache but it's a solvable headache.

    • 7
      mellow-sidewalk295

      This thread is gold. Thanks everyone.

  • 11
    warm-owl-579

    Go to urgent care today. Stop overthinking whether it's 'serious enough.' You were hit by a truck. Get it on record. Everything else — the car, the insurance nonsense — can be dealt with in the right order, but your health comes first and documentation comes a very close second.

  • 9
    bright-raven-748

    I went through almost this exact situation last year. The other driver 'forgot' to tell their insurance and I was stuck in limbo for almost two weeks. Eventually their insurer did respond once they got enough pressure — apparently insurers will investigate on their own if the policyholder ghosts them. Keep calling and document every single call with a date and time. It's annoying but it does eventually move.

  • 9
    quiet-badger-502

    Not legal advice, but the neck and shoulder thing caught my eye. A lot of people in your situation decide the soreness isn't worth making a big deal of and then regret it later when symptoms persist. At minimum, see a doctor and let them document what's going on. The property damage situation sounds frustrating but manageable — the physical piece is what I'd be paying attention to if I were you.

  • 7
    daring-stoat-376

    A couple of practical things: First, if the other driver's insurer denies the claim or stonewalls you too long, you can file a complaint with your state's department of insurance — that tends to light a fire under people. Second, keep every document you have: the accident photos, any texts with the other driver, the body shop estimates, everything. If this escalates at all, that paper trail is gold.

    • 3
      mellow-co-pilot486

      Exactly my experience. Persistence paid off in the end.

  • 6
    careful-swift-793

    Please go get checked out. I know it feels minor but neck and shoulder symptoms after an impact like that can be soft tissue injuries that don't fully show up until 48-72 hours later — sometimes longer. Getting evaluated now also creates a medical record tied to the accident date, which matters way more than most people realize until it's too late.