The Shoulder
The Shoulder
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Insurancepatient-marten-119

Boyfriend got rear-ended, bills piling up, insurance giving us nothing but 'we're reviewing it' — help?

Hey everyone. I'm posting on behalf of my boyfriend because he's honestly too overwhelmed to do it himself and I'm trying to help however I can.

About six weeks ago he got hit from behind at a red light — pretty significant impact. He didn't cause any of it, the other driver even admitted fault at the scene, and we have the police report to prove it. Since then he's been dealing with neck and back pain, been to urgent care twice, started physical therapy, and now has a doctor managing his care specifically tied to the accident.

Here's where it gets really stressful: he's here on a student visa. His finances are already tight — international tuition is no joke — and now we've got a stack of medical bills sitting on the counter that nobody seems to want to touch yet. Both insurances (his and the at-fault driver's) know about the claim. Every time we call, we get some version of "it's under review, we'll be in touch." No timeline, no clear next steps, nothing.

The financial pressure is bad enough, but the not-knowing is honestly the worst part. He's trying to keep up with his coursework while going to PT twice a week and stressing about whether some collections notice is going to show up before the insurance ever pays out.

Has anyone dealt with something like this? Specifically:

  • How long did it actually take for bills to get sorted out after a rear-end?
  • Is there anything we should be doing right now that we're probably not doing?
  • Did the stress ever let up, or does it just kind of stay awful until it's over?

Any experience or just general support is welcome. We feel pretty lost.

13replies

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13 replies

  • 19
    quick-stoat-567

    This made me stressed just reading it and I'm not even going through it. You sound like an amazing partner for showing up for him like this. The combination of school, visa stress, money pressure, AND recovering from an accident is genuinely a lot. I hope he has people around him IRL too. Sending you both good thoughts.

    • 17
      spry-otter-144

      Not legal advice, but I'll say this: the visa situation and the financial pressure are exactly the kinds of things insurance companies sometimes count on. A claimant who needs quick resolution is more likely to accept less. If bills are going unpaid and collections is a real concern, a personal injury attorney can sometimes negotiate directly with providers to keep things out of collections while the claim is pending. Most work on contingency so there's no upfront cost. Worth a consultation at minimum.

    • 8
      careful-walker497

      This is exactly what I needed to read today. Thank you.

  • 14
    spry-vole-896

    Former adjuster here. Honestly, the 'review' process can be legitimate, but it can also just be a queue and nobody's actively working the file. Here's a real tip: ask them specifically for the name of the adjuster assigned to the claim and get their direct contact info. Files with engaged claimants who follow up consistently tend to move faster. It's not fair, but it's how it works in practice.

    • 10
      honest-dreamer892

      Wish I had seen this a month ago — would have saved me a lot of stress.

  • 14
    clever-wren-631

    A few practical things: First, the medical providers may be willing to put the bills on hold (sometimes called a 'medical lien') while the claim resolves — it's worth calling each billing department and explaining there's an active auto insurance claim. They do this more often than people realize. Second, keep a running log of every phone call — date, time, who you spoke to, what they said. Third, at some point it might be worth at least talking to a PI attorney; most do free consultations and can tell you if hiring someone would actually help speed things up.

  • 13
    clever-swift-166

    I went through almost this exact thing two years ago — rear-ended, clear liability, and still spent months chasing the insurance company for answers. The 'under review' phase felt endless. What helped me was sending everything in writing instead of calling. Emails create a paper trail and for some reason adjusters respond faster when they know you have documentation of their non-answers. Hang in there, it does eventually move.

    • 10
      kind-mole-028

      That 'we're reviewing it' line is a classic delay tactic. The longer they string you out, the more likely you are to just accept a low offer out of desperation — especially if they know you're in a tough financial spot. Don't let them pressure you into settling anything while he's still in active treatment. Once you sign a release, that's it.

    • 6
      hopeful-driver374

      Did you have to escalate, or did they come around after the first ask?

  • 10
    brave-dove-459

    Please make sure he's keeping every single appointment and not skipping PT even when he's exhausted or discouraged. I know it sounds obvious, but gaps in treatment can be used against him later to argue his injuries weren't serious. Also, if he's having headaches, sleep problems, or anxiety on top of the physical stuff, he should mention all of that to his doctor. It all gets documented and it all matters.

    • 12
      mellow-fox-287

      I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but the fact that you have a police report, clear at-fault documentation, and he's been consistent with medical care puts you in a much better position than a lot of people in these situations. That stuff matters. The chaos is real but you're not starting from zero.

  • 10
    cool-marten-310

    Stop waiting for the insurance company to do the right thing on its own timeline. Get a PI lawyer on the phone this week — free consult, no commitment. Even if you don't hire anyone, you'll walk away knowing more than you do right now. Six weeks post-accident with bills sitting there and no resolution in sight is already the moment to stop being patient and start being proactive.

    • 4
      curious-parent400

      Wish I had seen this a month ago — would have saved me a lot of stress.