Borrowed my roommate's car, tapped someone in a parking garage — now I'm spiraling

A couple of process things that might help: (1) Get photos of the other car's position if you haven't already — even going back to the garage to photograph the space markings could help establish that the car was outside the lines. (2) Most states use comparative or contributory negligence principles, meaning fault can be split between parties. Their parking position could be relevant, though how much depends on your state. (3) Keep every text and voicemail from the other driver. If their story about damage changes, that paper trail matters.

Not legal advice, but the improper parking question is worth taking seriously from a fault perspective. In most jurisdictions, a driver has a duty to park within a designated space, and if they were measurably outside it, that could factor into a comparative fault analysis. Whether it's worth pursuing depends on the dollar amounts involved. If the other party makes a formal claim that seems inflated or unreasonable, a free consult with a PI attorney costs you nothing and could clarify your options quickly.

I just want to say — the fact that you left a note and filed a report says a lot about your character. A lot of people would've just driven off. You're handling this responsibly, and I hope it works out. Don't let the stress make you do something hasty like paying cash just to make it go away.

How far out of the space was the other car actually? Like, are we talking a foot over the line or genuinely blocking part of the lane? That distinction matters a lot if you're hoping to use their parking as a fault factor. Also, do you have any photos from right after it happened showing their car's position before they moved it?

The fact that they came at you with a big number right away is a yellow flag. Some people see 'young person, borrowed car, anxious' and immediately try to settle outside insurance for inflated cash. Do not pay anyone directly out of pocket without going through proper channels first. Once you hand over cash, you have basically no recourse if they come back claiming more damage later.

Former auto claims adjuster here. A few things: First, 'permissive use' is real and many standard policies cover it, but the limits might be lower than the primary insured's full coverage. Second — and this is important — do NOT accept the other driver's repair estimate at face value. Insurers typically require the shop to do a proper written estimate, and the number a driver throws out in a text message means nothing officially. Third, the improper parking could be documented as contributing to the loss. When I worked claims, we'd sometimes apportion partial fault to a parked vehicle if it was objectively outside its space. Not a guarantee, but worth noting.

Ugh, I had something almost identical happen when I borrowed a family member's car. The unlisted driver thing varies a lot — some policies have what's called 'permissive use' coverage, meaning if the owner gave you permission, you might still be covered even if you're not on the policy. Your roommate should call her insurer and ask specifically about that before assuming the worst.