The Shoulder
The Shoulder
65
Insurancedaring-finch-223

At-fault driver's insurance has gone totally silent — do I need a lawyer now or wait?

So my car got completely wrecked about six weeks ago. The other driver ran a red light and there were two witnesses who saw the whole thing, so fault isn't really in dispute. My own insurance stepped in pretty quickly, handled the total loss on my car, and has been picking up my medical bills in the meantime — which I'm grateful for, but I know that won't last forever and I assume they'll eventually want reimbursement from the at-fault carrier.

Here's what's driving me crazy: the other driver's insurance has not contacted me once. Not a letter, not a voicemail, not a single email. Nothing. I don't even know if they're investigating or just hoping I'll forget about them.

My injuries aren't like a broken bone you can point to on an x-ray. I've got soft tissue stuff in my neck and upper back, some rib soreness that's slowly getting better, and then the stuff that's harder to explain — I've been having trouble sleeping, I startle really easily when I'm driving now, and my concentration at work has been genuinely awful. My doctor mentioned it could be stress-response related to the crash.

So my questions for anyone who's been through this:

  • Do I reach out to the other insurance first, or just... keep waiting?
  • Is it smarter to get a lawyer involved now before anyone makes contact, or should I at least see what they offer first?
  • Does the "invisible" injury stuff (sleep, anxiety, cognitive) even count for anything in these claims?

I feel like I'm just sitting here watching the clock while they do whatever they want on their end. Any advice from people who've been through something similar would mean a lot.

13replies

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13 replies

  • 12
    bright-heron-876

    I was in almost this exact situation last year — other side just went radio silent for weeks. I made the mistake of waiting, and when they finally did call, the adjuster was super friendly and immediately started asking me to describe my injuries in detail. I didn't realize until later that conversation was almost certainly recorded and they were fishing for me to downplay things. Get someone in your corner before you talk to them, seriously.

  • 10
    silent-badger-589

    The silence isn't an accident. They know exactly who you are and what happened. They're just waiting to see if you'll get impatient and call them first — ideally without a lawyer — so they can lowball you before you understand what your claim is actually worth. Don't play that game.

    • 5
      curious-driver883

      Same boat here. Did anyone mention a deadline to watch out for?

  • 21
    candid-grouse-437

    I used to work on the claims side and I'll tell you honestly — files where the claimant has no attorney get handled very differently than represented ones. Not necessarily because adjusters are evil, but because there are internal benchmarks and unrepresented people just don't push back the same way. The psychological stuff you're describing (sleep disruption, hypervigilance while driving, concentration issues) absolutely has value in a claim, but you need someone who knows how to document and present it properly. Those injuries are real, they're just easy to dismiss if you don't know how to frame them.

  • 18
    brave-mole-228

    Please don't brush off the sleep and anxiety symptoms as 'just stress.' What you're describing — startle response, trouble concentrating, sleep issues after a traumatic event — can be signs of acute stress response or even early PTSD. Make sure you're telling your doctor ALL of it, not just the physical pain. That documentation matters both for your health and for your claim.

    • 1
      careful-survivor829

      How long did it end up taking in your case?

  • 8
    genuine-finch-773

    Not legal advice, but generally speaking: there's rarely a downside to at least consulting with a PI attorney before the other insurance makes contact. Most do free consultations. You're not obligated to hire anyone, but you'll walk away understanding your rights and what to watch out for. The soft-tissue plus psychological injury combo you're describing is exactly the kind of claim that benefits from professional guidance because those damages are real but require proper documentation to be taken seriously.

  • 13
    curious-sparrow-729

    A couple of practical things worth knowing: your own insurance covering your bills right now is likely operating under a right of subrogation, meaning they can seek reimbursement from the at-fault carrier later. That's between the two insurance companies mostly, but it can affect your net recovery if you're not careful about how things are structured. Also, every state has a statute of limitations on personal injury claims — usually somewhere between one and three years — so the clock is quietly running. You have time, but not infinite time.

  • 12
    bright-crow-866

    Don't wait for them to call you. Don't talk to them without knowing your rights first. Get a free consult with a PI lawyer this week — it costs you nothing and you'll have way more information to make a decision. The 'wait and see what they offer first' approach almost always means leaving money on the table.

    • 0
      curious-rider360

      Wish I had seen this a month ago — would have saved me a lot of stress.

  • 20
    spry-crane-767

    The fact that you're having trouble concentrating at work and you're getting startled while driving — that's not nothing. That's your life being affected. I really hope you're being kind to yourself and not just pushing through it. Please talk to someone, whether that's a lawyer, your doctor, or both. You deserve to actually recover, not just survive this.

    • 0
      careful-passenger641

      Seconding this. The same approach worked for me last year.

  • 10
    quiet-lynx-094

    Genuine question — have you actually been formally diagnosed with anything beyond the soft tissue injuries? Like, has a doctor specifically documented the cognitive and anxiety symptoms in your medical records? Because there's a real difference between 'I've been feeling off' and 'my doctor has noted stress-response symptoms in my chart.' That documentation gap could matter a lot.