The Shoulder
The Shoulder
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hearty-wolf-113

At-fault driver ghosting their own insurer — am I just stuck waiting forever?

So about six weeks ago I was rear-ended pretty hard at a red light. The guy who hit me pulled over, we exchanged info, seemed fine. Then he just... disappeared. Stopped answering his insurance company's calls, stopped responding to anything.

His insurer sent me a letter basically saying they can't confirm coverage or accept liability because their own policyholder won't talk to them. Like, how is that even legal? He caused the accident, I have a police report, I have two witnesses, and I have photos of both vehicles at the scene. And yet here I am with a car that needs thousands in repairs and a stack of physical therapy bills that keep growing.

I do carry uninsured/underinsured motorist coverage on my own policy, and my agent mentioned I could file through my own insurance — but I'm worried about my rates going up for something that was 100% not my fault. I'm also not sure if going through my own insurer somehow lets the at-fault driver off the hook.

Has anyone dealt with this exact situation? Did you end up filing through your own policy? Did your rates actually go up? And what happened with the medical bills in the meantime — did you just have to eat the costs while everything got sorted out?

I'm not trying to get rich here, I just want my car fixed and my PT bills covered. This whole thing feels like I'm being punished for someone else's disappearing act. Any advice or shared experience is welcome.

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10 replies

  • 22
    calm-sparrow-334

    Not legal advice, but this fact pattern — documented liability, uncooperative at-fault driver, ongoing medical treatment — is pretty common territory for PI attorneys. Many work on contingency so there's no upfront cost. A quick consult could at least clarify whether your UM claim is your best path or whether there are other options worth considering. Might be worth a free call just to understand your position.

    • 10
      weary-commuter803

      How long did it end up taking in your case?

  • 20
    quiet-fox-014

    Almost identical thing happened to me two years ago. Guy rear-ended me, gave me his info, then told his own insurance he didn't know anything about an accident. I ended up filing through my own UM coverage and honestly it went smoother than I expected. My rates did NOT go up — my agent confirmed that UM claims where you're not at fault are typically protected from rate increases, though that can vary by state. Definitely worth asking your insurer directly.

  • 20
    daring-mole-052

    File through your own insurance today. Stop waiting for the at-fault driver's carrier to do the right thing — they have zero incentive to move fast. Your UM coverage is there for exactly this reason. You can always pursue the at-fault driver separately later, but get your car fixed and your medical bills moving now.

    • 0
      gentle-traveler691

      Thanks for sharing. Hope things are getting a little easier for you.

  • 17
    calm-elk-306

    So here's the inside view: when a policyholder goes dark, the insurer genuinely does have limited options in the short term. They're not necessarily lying to you — they really can't admit liability without their insured's cooperation in most states. BUT that doesn't mean you have no options. Your UM/UIM coverage exists precisely for situations like this. File with your own carrier, let them subrogate against the at-fault driver later. That's literally what the process is designed for.

  • 11
    keen-seal-696

    A few things worth knowing: filing a UM claim through your own insurer doesn't let the at-fault driver off the hook legally. Your insurance company can and often does pursue reimbursement from him afterward — that's called subrogation. Also, hold onto every medical bill, every EOB, every receipt for anything accident-related. If this ever escalates to a claim or lawsuit, documentation of your out-of-pocket costs matters a lot.

  • 10
    silent-sparrow-572

    Ugh, this is so unfair. You did everything right and now you're the one stuck dealing with the fallout. I'm sorry you're going through this on top of recovering from the accident itself. Hoping you get some real answers soon.

  • 6
    sharp-otter-710

    Don't let the at-fault driver's insurer drag this out indefinitely. They know exactly what they're doing — if they delay long enough, some people just give up. Keep every single piece of communication in writing, and if they call you, follow up the call with an email summarizing what was said. Paper trail is everything.

  • 5
    genuine-stoat-612

    Please don't let the billing stress make you skip or cut short your physical therapy. I've seen people stop treatment early because they're anxious about costs piling up, and then they end up with chronic issues down the road that are way harder to treat. Keep going to your appointments and document everything your provider tells you. Your health has to come first here.