The Shoulder
The Shoulder
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Insurancebrave-otter-908

At-fault driver ghosting their own insurance — what can I actually do here?

Hey everyone, first time posting anywhere about this so bear with me.

About six weeks ago I was driving through an intersection on a green light when another driver blew straight through a red and clipped the entire front driver's side of my car. Pretty open-and-shut situation — there were two people on the sidewalk who saw the whole thing and gave statements on the spot, and the responding officer noted the violation in the report.

Here's my problem: the other driver apparently hasn't picked up the phone or replied to a single message from their own insurance company. The adjuster keeps telling me they're "waiting on a recorded statement from their insured" before they can move forward on liability. It's been a month and a half. My car is sitting at home with a crumpled fender, a busted headlight assembly, and what the body shop is calling possible frame involvement — so I'm nervous to even drive it much.

I have a high deductible on my own collision coverage, which is the main reason I've been trying to push through the at-fault driver's carrier instead of just filing on my own policy. But I'm starting to wonder if waiting is making things worse.

A few things I'm trying to figure out:

  • Can I actually force their insurance to make a liability decision without the driver's cooperation?
  • Is there any way to get compensated for the time I've been without a reliable car?
  • What about the long-term value hit to my vehicle even after repairs?

I'm not trying to squeeze anyone, I just want my car fixed and to feel like this is actually moving forward. Any advice or shared experiences would mean a lot right now.

12replies

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12 replies

  • 20
    cool-crane-768

    The "waiting on a statement from our insured" line is one of the oldest delay tactics in the book. Technically, in most states an insurer can and does make liability determinations based on independent evidence — police reports, witness accounts, photos. Don't let them convince you they're helpless without their driver talking to them. Push back and ask them directly what evidence you can submit to move the decision forward.

  • 20
    wise-marten-453

    Not legal advice, but a few things you said stand out. If there's potential frame damage, you really shouldn't be driving that vehicle until it's been properly inspected — that's a safety issue that could also complicate a future injury claim if something happens. On the diminished value front, get that in writing from a certified appraiser sooner rather than later; it's much harder to argue after repairs are done. If the insurer continues to stall unreasonably, a brief consult with a PI attorney is often free and can clarify your leverage quickly.

    • 1
      steady-neighbor216

      Seconding this. The same approach worked for me last year.

  • 18
    wise-otter-641

    Worked claims for years. Honest truth: adjusters genuinely do prefer to get a statement from their own insured, but they are NOT required to have one before making a liability call. If the police report cites the other driver and you have independent witnesses, that file has enough to move on. The holdup is often just internal workload or a handler waiting to see if the insured eventually resurfaces. Escalate to a supervisor at the carrier and use the word 'unreasonable delay' — that tends to get attention.

    • 7
      kind-commuter762

      Wish I had seen this a month ago — would have saved me a lot of stress.

  • 17
    tidy-raven-606

    I went through almost the exact same thing last year — other driver just went silent and their insurer kept stalling. What finally moved things for me was filing through my own insurance and letting them go after the at-fault carrier through subrogation. I know the deductible stings upfront, but my insurer recovered it for me a few months later. Might be worth at least asking your agent if that's an option.

  • 14
    candid-fox-745

    Are you doing okay physically? Sometimes after an impact like that people feel fine for a few days and then soreness or headaches creep in. If anything feels off — neck stiffness, headaches, jaw pain — please get checked out and keep records of it. I've seen people dismiss symptoms early and regret it later. Your health matters more than the car timeline.

    • 2
      gentle-parent355

      Really glad you posted an update — gives the rest of us some hope.

  • 11
    steady-heron-313

    A couple of things worth knowing: most states have insurance regulations that require carriers to acknowledge claims promptly and make liability decisions within a defined window — often 30 to 45 days depending on where you live. If they're past that, you may have grounds to file a complaint with your state's Department of Insurance. It costs you nothing and often gets a claim unstuck faster than anything else. Also, yes — rental/loss-of-use costs and diminished value are both legitimate things to document and claim separately from the repair estimate.

  • 6
    candid-fox-889

    File a complaint with your state insurance regulator online right now. Takes maybe 15 minutes. Insurers hate those because they generate mandatory response timelines. Also call your own insurer today and ask specifically about subrogation — you may get your deductible back. Stop waiting for the other carrier to do the right thing on their own schedule.

    • 20
      quick-crane-099

      Quick question — did you get a rental car or any kind of loaner while this is dragging out? And was a police report actually filed at the scene, or just an exchange of info? Those two things make a pretty big difference in how much leverage you actually have here.

  • 5
    plain-swan-801

    Ugh, this sounds so exhausting on top of already dealing with the stress of the accident itself. Six weeks is way too long to just be left hanging. I hope you're at least being kind to yourself through this — it's a lot to manage.