The Shoulder
The Shoulder
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Car accidentsclever-marmot-329

Anyone else feel like a completely different person after their accident? It's been 14 months

I'm 24 and I got hit by a semi that drifted into my lane on the interstate back in early spring of last year. My car got pushed into the median and I rolled. I walked away with a concussion, some cracked ribs, and a lot of bruising — nothing "life-threatening" according to the ER, but it doesn't feel that way inside my head.

Physically I've healed up pretty well. But mentally? I feel like whoever I was before that day kind of... stayed at that accident scene.

Driving is the obvious thing — I white-knuckle it every single time, and I constantly feel like I'm about to cause something terrible even when I'm doing everything right. I check my mirrors obsessively. I slow way down when semis pass me and my heart just hammers.

But the weirder thing I wasn't expecting: I feel reckless in other parts of my life now. Like I quit a job impulsively, I pick fights I wouldn't have picked before, I just... don't think things through the way I used to. My friends have noticed and honestly I've noticed too.

I talked to my doctor about the anxiety stuff and she gave me some referrals but I haven't followed up yet. I guess I'm wondering — has anyone else felt this shift? Like the accident rewired something? Did it eventually level out for you, or is this just who I am now?

Not trying to be dramatic, I just genuinely don't recognize myself sometimes and it's scary.

10replies

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10 replies

  • 17
    silent-finch-599

    Oh wow, I could have written parts of this myself. I was sideswiped by a box truck two winters ago and the hypervigilance while driving never fully went away — but I want to tell you it did get a lot quieter over time. The impulsive stuff you're describing is real too. I made some genuinely bad calls in the months after my accident that I still cringe about. My therapist eventually connected it to the trauma response. You're not broken, your nervous system is just stuck in a threat mode it hasn't figured out how to turn down yet.

    • 8
      plainspoken-sidewalk597

      Thank you both, this gave me the push I needed to make the call.

    • 5
      honest-survivor445

      Really glad you posted an update — gives the rest of us some hope.

  • 19
    clever-mole-224

    The behavioral changes you're describing — impulsivity, not thinking things through, emotional reactivity — those can actually be connected to a concussion, even a "mild" one. The frontal lobe stuff especially. I'm not diagnosing you obviously, just saying: please follow up on those referrals your doctor gave you, and specifically mention that you had a concussion and that you've noticed personality-level changes since. A neuropsychologist might be worth asking about. You deserve a real evaluation, not just a pat on the back and some anxiety pamphlets.

    • 15
      clear-vole-290

      Not legal advice, but — what you're describing (anxiety, personality changes, behavioral shifts after a traumatic accident) is something that can absolutely be part of a personal injury claim, not just the physical injuries. Psychological harm is real and documentable. If you haven't already, it's worth at least talking to a PI attorney about whether the at-fault driver's insurance should be covering your mental health treatment. Many do free consultations. Just something to keep in your back pocket.

    • 9
      hopeful-dreamer669

      Curious whether you did this on your own or had help with it.

  • 9
    steady-hare-446

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. The fact that you can articulate all of this so clearly tells me you're more self-aware than you're giving yourself credit for. Please do follow up with those referrals — even just one appointment. You went through something genuinely terrifying and you deserve actual support, not just to white-knuckle your way through it alone.

  • 11
    brave-fox-227

    Please be careful if the other side's insurance reaches out to you about a settlement. The mental health stuff you're describing often takes a long time to fully surface and understand, and if you settle before you have a clear picture of where you're at — including the concussion follow-up the nurse mentioned — you could be signing away rights to compensation for ongoing treatment. Don't let them rush you.

  • 13
    calm-marten-019

    14 months out from something that violent and you're still here, still driving, still reflecting on yourself honestly? That's not nothing. I know it doesn't feel like progress but you're asking the right questions. That awareness is actually a really good sign.

  • 20
    tidy-sparrow-712

    Follow up on the referrals. I know it's easy to put it off but you've literally described a concussion plus ongoing psychological symptoms and you haven't gotten actual mental health support yet. That's the one concrete thing in your control right now — just make the call. Everything else can wait until you do that.