The Shoulder
The Shoulder
71
Car accidentshumble-sparrow-132

Accident basically erased 2 years of fitness progress — anyone else dealing with this?

I don't even know how to start this without sounding like I'm whining, but here goes.

Before my crash last spring I was genuinely the healthiest I'd ever been in my adult life. I'd been doing martial arts three nights a week, hiking on weekends, had dropped almost 30 pounds over about two years of actual hard work. I felt good in my body for maybe the first time ever.

Then someone ran a red light and T-boned me, and everything just... stopped.

I've got ongoing issues with my neck and lower back — still doing PT — and every time I try to push even a little bit, I pay for it for the next two or three days. I've put almost all the weight back on. My clothes don't fit. I feel like a stranger in my own body.

Here's the thing that's really getting to me right now: I'm supposed to be a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding in about five months. I want to feel like myself again for that. I've tried low-impact stuff — pool walking, gentle yoga — but even that has bad days mixed in.

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else went through that grief of losing a version of yourself you worked really hard for. Did it ever come back? Did you find ways to stay somewhat active while you were still healing? And honestly — is the physical stuff something that gets factored into a claim, or does it just get ignored because it's not a "hard" medical bill?

Any solidarity or advice appreciated. I'm feeling pretty isolated about this.

12replies

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12 replies

  • 9
    candid-heron-074

    Oh this hit me hard. I was training for a half marathon when a rear-end collision messed up my shoulder and hip. Eighteen months of work just gone. The grief part is real — people don't talk about that enough. It's not just pain, it's mourning who you were. I'm slowly getting back but it took WAY longer than any doctor told me it would. Hang in there.

    • 13
      brave-marmot-252

      The frustration you're feeling is completely valid, and honestly it's one of the most underreported parts of traumatic injury recovery. Your nervous system is still in a heightened state — that's partly why you crash so hard after even gentle activity. Pool walking and aquatic PT are actually great calls. I'd also ask your PT specifically about pacing strategies rather than just pushing to a tolerance level. And please, don't measure recovery in pounds right now. Your body is literally using resources to heal.

    • 7
      thankful-road-soul336

      Did the timeline change anything for you? Mine dragged on for weeks.

  • 7
    humble-owl-564

    To your last question — yes, loss of enjoyment of life and loss of physical capacity absolutely matters in a claim, but the adjuster is NOT going to volunteer that. They'll focus on your medical bills and try to close out fast. The fact that you can't do activities you used to do, that you've had documented regression in health — that's real damages. Don't let them minimize it.

    • 2
      patient-walker578

      Appreciate the detailed write-up. Saving this for later.

  • 14
    clear-marmot-147

    Not legal advice, but what you're describing — documented lifestyle impact, loss of physical capacity, ongoing PT — is often referred to as non-economic damages. Courts and claims processes do recognize this stuff, especially when there's a paper trail (PT notes, maybe even old gym records or fitness app data showing the before/after). Worth having someone look at your situation. Just don't settle anything while you're still actively treating.

  • 7
    plain-tern-958

    I just want to say I'm really sorry. You worked so hard and had something taken from you through zero fault of your own. That's genuinely unfair and it makes sense that you're grieving it. Five months is still some time — be gentle with yourself but don't give up on feeling good for that wedding. You deserve to be there feeling like YOU.

  • 18
    keen-elk-856

    Former adjuster here. Honestly? The lifestyle and activity loss stuff gets low-balled constantly because claimants don't document it well. If you have anything — old fitness app screenshots, photos from hikes, even social media posts showing your activity level before — save all of it. And keep a simple journal now of what you can't do and how it affects your day. That kind of personal record actually does get used and it matters more than people realize.

    • 5
      patient-walker824

      Curious whether you did this on your own or had help with it.

  • 10
    sharp-finch-021

    I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but the fact that you're still trying — pool walking, yoga, asking questions — says a lot. You didn't lose who you are, your body is just going through something really hard. That fitness baseline you built? It's probably still helping you recover faster than if you hadn't done the work. You'll find your way back to yourself. Maybe a different path, but still you.

  • 15
    patient-swan-090

    Practical things: (1) Talk to your PT about setting a specific, realistic goal around the wedding timeline — not weight, but function and endurance. (2) Get everything documented medically, including how activity affects your pain levels. (3) Don't settle your claim until you know your actual recovery ceiling. A lot of people settle too early and then find out their limitations are permanent. Five months feels short but it's enough time to make real progress if you're strategic about it.

    • 9
      tired-optimist661

      Same boat here. Did anyone mention a deadline to watch out for?